The One Sided Friendship

We've all been there. The friendship that seems resemble a river, only flowing one way. My tactics when making friends are simple; we get along, laugh together, connect with someone or all of the above, we can be friends. I guess I use the "Innocent until proven guilty" approach. For someone easily hurt, this is not the strategy to use.

One who takes on this frame of mind has to be prepared for a world of pain. Alright... that could possibly be a little bit of an exaggeration, but I can't stress enough the ridiculousness I've encountered throughout my life in the social realm, especially in my recent encounters in Charleston, SC. Let us explore...

I have met several people in this southern city that feel friendship and opportunity should come to them. If you're the main character of the new and exciting Spielberg flick, than yes, I'll probably come to you. Unfortunately for me I know none of these people. Therefore, you can conclude that whoever I'm talking about has no fame or political clout ergo no excuse for the following:

• Continuously rejecting plans based on the distance from your home to mine but getting angry when I refuse to come to you. (News Flash: It's the same distance from your house to mine as it is from mine to yours)
• Expecting me to support you in your various activities such as sports, parties, etc., but repeatedly blowing off anything important to me in which I express my desire to have you there. Thanks friend.
• Allowing me to pay for many things (especially when it was clearly a loan) and then not only failing to return the favor, but proclaim that the payment period has expired and is no longer valid.
• Upon meeting my new boyfriend for about two minutes and exchanging no more than a handshake, proclaiming I can do better. 
• Deciding it's appropriate to judge everything I do or say not only to you, but to anyone else you might know.
• Publicly bashing the people of which I date or associate myself without any base for your reasoning.
• Expecting me to join you in your plans for the night and get upset when your desired plans were not in the cards for me that night.
• Not calling but expecting me to call
• And the kicker, doing ALL of these things and telling me I've been a bad friend.

If you qualify for more than two of these things, I'm surprised people hang out with you. I know that I am reevaluating what I require in the people I choose to spend my time with...

What? My name isn't showing up when you're phone rings? It's because I found better friends, Douche!

Ending on a positive note: Lucky for me, the friendship strategy I described in the beginning of this post has allowed me to meet some amazing people. The ones that stuck around and didn't pull these ridiculous stunts are very much in my life, and I consider myself so lucky. You know who you are wonderful friends :)

The Confused Graduate

The current economy sucks. "Deb, tell me something I don't know!?" Right. Because we haven't talked/seen/heard/banged our heads against the wall enough times already with this depressing, tedious and tired subject. However, I've found this economy thing to be unique to any other situation whether it be locally, nationally or worldwide. The fundamental difference? It directly effects me.

This might sound extremely selfish. It is. I'm not a bad person. Really. Anyone who knows me can defend this position. Here are the reasons why I believe this is the case:

• I Don't Liter. 
• This might not seem like a lot, but a lot of people seem to think the entire earth is their garbage can. Without me or my incessant bitching, you would all be hiking through heaps of trash. You're welcome.
• I Don't Kick Animals: Or hurt them in any way physically (even when I want to)
• Lets face it. You are the one who didn't train your pet. Even if you did, they probably jump, are loud, needy, fart a lot and carry unwanted parasites. I can't guarantee I won't kick you for housing this thing and not taking proper care of it.
• Are You the Asshole Who is "Accidently" in the Wrong Lane and Needs to Get Over Immediately? I Let You In!
• Unless:
•  I'm in a hurry, bad mood, looking forward to something, not paying attention, tired, irritable, sick, excited to get to the beach/pool/restaurant/my bed, etc.
• You don't signal. Dick.
• I'm Usually Have a Smile on My Face
• If I don't have a smile on my face, it's probably your fault. Which makes you the bad person.

I could go on, but I think I've made my point. See? Not a bad person. Lets move on.

Horrible things have occurred in this world. Wars, famine, genocide, economic hardship (which seems much less harsh against those first three), homelessness, illiteracy and deuteranopia - just to name a few.

I am fortunate enough to have not experienced any of these. They were abstract ideas. Don't get me wrong, that makes me lucky as hell- probably luckier than most people in this world. I am very thankful, and if you're one of those people, you should be too. 

The economy being in peril is no longer abstract to me. I am now one of those people that did exactly what I was supposed to do (good grades in college, extra curricular activities, a bachelors degree, letters of recommendation, etc.) and still wound up in a dead end job with no career path or potentials. Suck.

I've decided that while I begin this serious adventure down the path of self exploration, I will report back to the world. Congratulations! You are lucky enough to share my frustration, sadness, and scared-shitless right along with me. Buckle up, if it's anything like my driving, prepare for a bumpy ride.